knee-caps

Its been forever since I've posted, not that it matters since I have no followers. Anyway, Andrew and I are fighting, I have NCS, not POTS, I do have IBS, and I also happen to have a swollen knee-cap because this morning I was getting into the car to go into school late for the second time this week, and I tried to lift my rolling backpack up into the car, and then I heard a very loud terrible crunch and I was on the ground screaming. Thank the universe that I fell to the ground in a way that moved my knee-cap back to where it belonged, because I don't know what I would have done. Well, thats a lie. I would have done the same thing that I always do when that happens, move it back and try to get up. But the thing was this time I had already been having a terrible morning, and my mom was there with me, and I was just crying so hard, it was just... very different. It was as if the cries were primal, in a sense. I felt animal. Like an injured , helpless, animal. And considering I am human, and definitely not a monkey or anything, (although sometimes I wonder what it would be like...) I was very upset by the fact that I felt so helpless. I don't like being that way. I was sitting in the middle of the driveway, holding my knee for dear life, ugh. It was terrible. Long-ish story short, I have had a terrible day. :(


Caesura